A dent in the universe
An hour and a half ago, the most important person in modern technology died.
He changed how we think, how we enjoy music, art, film and even how we communicate.
When I first heard, an SMS, I didn’t believe it. I booted up the laptop to check. The internet was overflowing with the news. Twitter was down.
Steve jobs passed away, surrounded by his family and friends, and millions more joined them, in thought. A dent had been created in the universe.
Steve has built objects which help the autistic talk, the deaf hear and the blind make sense of the world. For those of us lucky enough to experience them, his inventions make music enrich our lives and let us write stories, experiences and almost anything we can imagine.
As I sit at my desk, surrounded by his ideas and designs, I truly realise again what a force for good and amazement this man, a devout Buddhist and Vegetarian, was. It’s hard to pick somebody who’s brought more peace and ease to the world.
As I sit at my desk, my phone starts to vibrate. Short, quick flutters. Again and again.
As I sit at my desk, I call up my task launcher. I type the command ‘Shut down’, but can’t hit ‘Return’. Through welled up tears, I delete the command, and instead type ‘Sleep’.
Things that I want
Every so often, I find things online which I decide I want. Some of these things are within my spending power, a whole lot more are most certainly not.
Many of these items are found on sites such as Reddit’s Shut Up And Take My Money section, as well as the usual sites such as Engadget, Gizmodo, Tested and magazines such as and wonderful Wired UK.
1. The Beach Resort
Firstly, at the height of luxury, take a look at this resort. It’s called the “Dhigu Resort”, and it’s in the Maldives. This place is about $500 per night, and has a minimum of a 7 night stay. As you can see in the featured image for this post, a lot of the rooms are basically outside. That should tell you all you need to know about the climate of this place! Interestingly, they include a TV with a DVD player with each suite, which seems to be counterintuitive to the vibe that they are trying to give off.
If you take a look outside your villa, you might be able to see puffer fish, sting rays and baby reef sharks. It’s kind of hard to describe how awesome this place looks, so you’ll have to use this picture to get the idea.
The Luxury Dhigu Resort, Maldiv
2. The Bag
All my life, I have wanted to be very like Indiana Jones. Imagine my joy when I discovered the website for leather-workers Saddleback Leather. These people make serious leather bags. The one which mainly caught my eye is the Tobacco Brown Briefcase. Starting at $519, it costs more then a night at the beach resort above. You probably save on flights though.
It’s made out of pigskin, has no breakable parts (and a 100 year warranty to back that up), nice features like a hidden false bottom and 2 open interior pockets for gadgets. What more could I need?
Sadly, due to the price, I may have to content myself with one of the wallets they make instead. But some day, when this blog makes me rich and famous, I’ll get me one of these bad boys.
Saddleback Leather Brown Tobacco Briefcase
3. The Cups
Here’s something that would be a little more affordable, if ThinkGeek’s shipping to Europe wasn’t so insane. Ctrl-Alt-Del cups! Now, there are a few letdowns to the design of these things. Firstly, it’s horribly hard to drink out of a square. It’s just not a good shape for consuming liquids. Secondly, these things are made out of plastic, which is quite sad. I’m sure that the type of people who want these things would be willing to spend an extra $15 to have them made out of quality crockery, or anything other then plastic, really.
They are dishwasher safe, and hold 8 ounces.
Ctrl-Alt-Del cups
4. The Computer Desk.
Heading straight back up to the world of “you’ll never be able to afford it”, we have the The Emperor 200 chair. It would fit right into any super-villain lair. It looks like a dinosaur and a scorpion got together one day, and decided to make a gaming device which would cost more then the monthly income of most people. It’s speakers are designed by Bose, it can have up to 3 24″ monitors mounted and it has it’s own LED lighting system, for some reason. What more could anybody want?
Emperor 200 chair
Surefire Shoestring Dating Tips
This was written as a part of a larger website, all about how to entertain yourself on the cheap. There are references littered throughout to other articles, and to see the website in it’s entirety, click here. For now though, just imagine that you are entering a world of FrugalScience…
There is a single pressing danger that we have not yet covered on this site. Once which could strike at any time.
Whether you are staying in with friends or going out on the lash, you might draw the attention of a member of the opposite sex. Or, hey, the same sex. We don’t judge here. We are scientists. We only judge results, and boy, is that some result!
If you are anything like myself, sheer panic may well set in. How will you cope? Your stinky roommate is using your living room as a clothesline. Your bank account is emptier then a banker’s heart. You know next to nothing about that girl who’s showing up tonight. How can you salvage the situation?
From here on, I will be making the bold assumption that you have being paying attention to the hypothetical situations contained within this website. We have discussed how to entertain your friends on a shoestring, and how to go out for a weekend of alcoholic fun without breaking the bank. These two skills will prove invaluable during this final, and very real, test.
Firstly, it should be noted that this will likely be a challenge. Students, as a rule, are bad at cheap dates. We aim to give you the tools necessary to make yourself the exception. This will not be an easy task, and you’ll have to rid yourself of preconceptions held by many students that have come before you. A date consists of more then a couple of cans of OLM and hitting the sack. Equally, a trip to the local dive won’t quite hit the spot.
A night in
Dinner – Staying In
A candle creates a glowing cave of light, an almost sparklingly white tablecloth, a single red rose in a thin glass vase. We have all seen the movies, while eating microwave dinners and sitting on couches. It’s impossible to live up to the expectations of the “TV Date”, but most people worth your time understand this. They just want you to try.
It is presumed that you will need to eat. Takeaways are expensive, and noodles aren’t particularly nutritious. I suggest doing something which may be slightly outside your comfort zone. Spend some money on raw ingredients. While this may at first seem to end up being more expensive than the pizza option, they will last you for several meals, spreading out the cost of eating.
There are many quick and dirty meals to be made by the unskilled student, most of which fall under the optimistic title of “stir-fry”. A stir-fry is a fancy title for the result of throwing every vegetable you can find and some chopped meat into a pan with some oil and soy sauce. It’s as easy as it sounds.
For example, you could thinly chop up some fresh green peppers, carrots, some baby corn and onion, and then slice up some cheap chicken fillet. Wipe a thin layer of oil around a pan, then throw in a healthy dose of soy sauce. Start by cooking your chicken in the pan, using a wooden spoon to fling it around until it’s no longer pink in the center. Add all your vegetables and stir-fry for 2-4 minutes. Serve with rice.
This entire meal will cost about €15, and will feed four. This means that you will have LOADS left over, and will do your next two dinners. You should ask people on dates more often, since it saves you money!
Dinner – Going Out
Bringing a date out for dinner can be an expensive ambition. You should set some ground rules. Firstly, ensure that you agree with your date that you will each pay your own part of the bill. This means that there won’t be any awkward moment near the end of the meal, when you are unsure who’s paying.
Secondly, don’t go to that fancy restaurant in the centre of town. Instead, find a small, lesser-known one. Make up some backstory about how this is your favourite restaurant in all the world, and phone ahead, making a reservation. Being led to your table on arrival is pretty impressive. If your date goes to the bathroom at any point, give a waiter the cost of a desert and a few euro tip. Ask them to bring the desert out, as if it were on the house ‘for the beautiful couple’.
At this point, you have done several things. You’ve suggested that you are the type of cultured person who have a a favourite restaurant which doesn’t serve fast food. You’ve also made it seem like you are friendly enough with the owners of the restaurant that they bring you free deserts. What more could a potential suitor want?
If going to a cheaply-priced restaurant seems off the cards, why not try for a picnic? Grab some cheap bread rolls (make sure they are crispy though) and make some sandwiches. Make sure to be aware of your date’s dietary requirements though, as a swollen throat usually dampens the mood. I’ll discuss this option in a bit more detail later.
Entertainment
Now that your stomachs have been well filled, it is time to take a look at the various ways which you can entertain both yourself, and the object of your desire.
Entertaining a date is quite a different activity than entertaining a group of friends. In most cases, you can’t simply stick on a football match or the latest Disney Princess movie.
Since you probably aren’t very well versed on the interests of your date, you will probably have to get creative. Here are some techniques you may employ.
Entertainment – Staying in
If your amazing cooking skills haven’t yet sealed the deal, fear not! There are still a few tricks that we are going to place up your sleeve.
If you decide that a film is the way to go, ensure that you have several films ready to go, each of a different genre. Even better, many games consoles and devices such as Apple TV allow you rent movies instantly, over the internet. If you have a slow internet connection, start the download before dinner.
If you have a games console such as the Wii or Xbox with Kinect, you may well have endless entertainment at your disposal. Multiplayer games such as Dance Dance Revolution will ensure that you both build up a bit of a sweat. This type of game is a much better choice then a first person shooter, as it is more widely accessible.
If you feel the date is up for it, why not do something more interesting? Try baking a cake together. This will let you learn if you work well as a team under pressure. Such data is important when it comes to choosing a long-term mate, and even if the date turns out to be a bust, you have a cake.
Entertaining – Going Out
Going out on a cheap date is easier then it first seems. If your date is not going to be late at night, and the weather is fine, picnic. Grab a light rug, make some sandwiches and bring a drink of your choice. Remember, you want to give off a great impression here, so the details are important.
For the sandwiches, rolls are the better choice. They are less likely to get squashed in the picnic bag. Head to your local Spar or Centra at about midday, and you’ll pick up some freshly baked ones. While you are there, grab some ham, cheese and iceberg lettuce. Find an area which doesn’t suffer much footfall, and enjoy your meal.
If the weather isn’t great, or you dislike outside dining, there are some other options available. One good trick is to tell your love interest to dress for what she’d like to do on a date, then prepare for several opportunities. For instance, you could book a game of bowling, reserve a table in a restaurant like the one described above and track down a museum which is open at the correct time. Next pick what you are going to do based on what she wears.
If you decide to book a game of bowling, there are a few things you must watch out for. Firstly, be sure that the bowling alley is relatively nice. Aspects such as floor hygiene and shoe odours should be taken into account here. Also remember to check that no children’s parties are booked in for that time. After all, there is nothing less romantic then thirty twelve-year olds running around underfoot.
When it comes to cultural things to do, you may have to be a little coy. Talk to your date’s friends and try to find out what she’s interested in. There are likely to be plenty of smaller museums you have never heard about. For instance, there are small galleries that deal with subjects such as photography, print, transport and even waxworks hidden around Dublin.
Final Thoughts
I hope that I have managed to dispel the belief that a good date is beyond the grasp of an average student.
Remember, the most important thing that you should take away from this is that it is not impossible to have a classy date on a shoestring budget. Make use of my findings, and go woo the world!
Homelessness in Ireland documentary
Podcast: Download
Take a listen to this documentary myself and a few friends made about homelessness in Ireland. It’s 12 minutes long, features an ex drug abuser and alcohol addicted man who used to be homeless as well as Peter McVerry, founder of the Peter McVerry Trust, a charity which “supports young homeless people to break the cycle of homelessness and move towards independent living through the provision of a continuum of care services.”
The four of us who made it (listed below) are really proud of how it turned out. Michael even composed original music for the darned thing! I hope you will enjoy it.
Researcher and Interviewer – Alan Leonard
Voicework, Editing – Cian Mac Mahon
Voxpops – Greg Creevey
Editing, Guitar – Michael Finn
Dancing through the stars
Space by Sweetie187
I’m dancing through the stars in my small ship, heading towards whatever waits. I’m escaping so much, running towards such promise. I can’t hide from what happened back home, but I could certainly run for a while. I don’t know what’s waiting, and neither does anybody else. That’s the beauty of it, see? I’m going where nobody has gone. It’s going to take a while, but if where I was going had record books, I’d certainly make it into them. Growing bored of watching the Autopilot tweak our course, I drift off to sleep.
Fire, pain, anger. They all come rushing back to me, like stale friends. A threat of injection comes again. “Focus! Focus!” The details crash over me, dragging me out into a whirlpool of numbers. They swirl around inside me, and my brain sorts them out. Plus nine four seven six one nine point six four owed to account seven three six eight. Minus four three one nine owed to account six four eight nine. Null on account three two two. Null on account nine six. My mind drifts to my mother, the last time I saw her snarli
The injection hits, pouring more and more data into my brain. The details hammer into my skull, number after number after number. I slump, and the only thing holding me up is the thick wire plugged into the crown of my skull. I’m hanging, like a stuffed toy. Details. Account codes. Above all else, numbers. My mind screams in protest, burns up, and stops. I’m nothing but a machine now, a living spreadsheet.
My eyes shoot open, and I’m back in the cockpit, dancing through the stars. I’ve escaped, and I hope they’ll never find me. Glancing at the autopilot, I squeeze out of my chair and crawl through the hatch, down to the tiny luggage compartment, where I’ve got the man who made my life hellish, the CEO.
The first kiss
You were probably far too old to be having your first kiss. Not too late into the double digits, but certainly not early either. You were probably past the stage at which society deems optimal for the first kiss, to be honest. I can’t remember what age you were, but I think you were 15 or 16 probably. Most people that age would have had dozens.
You are standing in the ice-cold breeze, sweat dripping off you from the carefully moderated rave taking place in the converted restaurant. Black bags cover windows so you can’t see in. More importantly though, I suppose, people can’t see you. Just standing there. Being kissed. Pathetic.
She’s sweaty too, and not in that nice way that you heard about. Clammy. It’s probably the wind’s fault. I don’t know how you managed to avoid the nose issue. Did you tilt to the right or the left? She’s a bit shorter then you, so it probably doesn’t matter all that much, to be honest. I think you should be more worried about other things, like what to do with your hands.
There you are, your mouth open, this foreign piece of meat stampeding through it. It doesn’t really taste like much. It’s kind of a senseless experience, you decide. Except for one thing. She’s being quite rough, and you aren’t really enjoying that aspect.
Let’s talk about how you got into this situation in the first place. That girl, not the kissing girl, but THE girl, is awkwardly aware that you have been obsessed with her for over a year. She’s above you, in every single sense of the word, except she’s so NICE about it! She decided that it would be a good idea to get you to move on, and noticed that you had your eyes on that green-haired girl with the brown eyes. So, that faithful night, during the weekly Band Camp Disco (can you believe that they actually insist on only playing music with orchestral instruments? It’s as if they think it’s cute) she decided to try to set you two up. You go along, because, hell green-hair probably doesn’t see much in you. How wrong you were. Maybe.
What if green-hair did it as a sort of favour? It would certainly explain why she ran away giggling after. All you could think was that you wanted a second chance. A bit more gentle this time, please.
For the rest of the night, you felt nauseated. You saw THE girl with another guy, and another, and another, her hair draping down her glistening bare back, her strap-less dress leaving rather little to the imagination. Was that a smile you saw, as she broke away? You need to pee, but the lines to the toilet are too long. You decide to try to find green-hair. But you can’t. All your friends (except that one weird tuba player) are stuck in their own games of tongue twister, and they seem to be enjoying it. What did you do wrong? You want to go back to your room, but they won’t let you. “No leaving the disco until after clean-up”. So you go hang with the people playing board games in the next room. They stare at you, aware (thanks to your slightly red lip) that you got kissed. They are, for the most part, in awe.
This was probably the first ever thing that I have written for public consumption that made me feel quite uncomfortable. I think that I’ll go back to my usual type of fiction soon. Hey, at least nobody can say I didn’t try!
Procrastination
Right, time to write my essay. It’s on the validity of technological determinism in the world of Finding Nemo.
BLINK
Enough time spent on reorganising my downloads folder. I’ve given each file type its own folder, and set up applescripts to automatically sort them. That will make life easier, I’d imagine.
BLINK
Imagine if the whole world were to just stop. How would I know? I closed the curtains so as to remove as many distractions as possible. If the world stopped, I probably wouldn’t be able to open the door, as it would be frozen in time. Would I be able to manoeuvre yourself out of my chair? Hiro in Heroes seemed to be able to navigate around frozen time, although technically, that was just significantly slowed down time
BLINK
Time to get back to doing that essay. I’ve been in the room for just under an hour now, and have gotten the first 100 words of the first draft done. That’s certainly a good start, now I just need to keep going!
BLINK
I’m going onto her Facebook profile, and getting that horrible pit in my stomach when I see how often she talks to people who aren’t me. I know that it’s a stupid feeling, us two aren’t even dating, and statistically, she would likely talk to the combined might of other people then I, even if we were dating. Imagine if I were, though, dating her, I mean. Where would I bring her on a date? She didn’t seem to be hugely enthused by the gallery that we went to, which was good, because neither was I. So art is out. Remember that time that we lay on the trampoline watching the astroid shower at 2AM? She seemed to like that a fair bit but flaming specks of dust shooting through the atmosphere aren’t really things that you can control.
BLINK
About those folders I organised, what happens if a file shows up that the script doesn’t recognise? I’m fairly sure that it will just leave it alone. Maybe I could have it sort of jump up and down at me, to let me know that I need to add a rule? What if I decide not to add a rule? Crap, I’ll need to sort that out too. It could be one of those weird video formats that I’ll open in VLC one time, and then delete. I don’t really need a special folder for that. Sure, I wonder if I can make it so all video formats go into the one folder? Would that be possible? It would certainly take up a fair amount of time collecting all the different file extensions so that the script would know what to do with them.
BLINK
Right, so lets pretend that I get past the first date stage. That’s done. Over with. What now? Would I change my facebook status straight away or leave it a few weeks to see if it worked out? That’s always a toughie. Some girls don’t consider a relationship to have started until you change your facebook relationship status. Some guys too, I suppose. I’d probably wait a few weeks, to see if it was all some sort of cosmic joke. But what if it wasn’t? What if, by some fluke, she had actually fallen for me? I suppose I’d probably want to spend all day cuddling, but then there would be the whole ‘do I eat, or do I stay here’ problem.
BLINK
So, presuming that I can somehow get out of the bedroom, or time had just really really slowed down, what the hell would I do then? It would be pretty damn boring, I’d need to make my own entertainment. I could read every book ever written, or read the entire Wikipedia. Actually, could I? Would electrons be effected by the world stopping, meaning that the internet wouldn’t work? That could be a problem. And I’d better hope that somebody had left all the lights on in the house, except one of the bed rooms, or I wouldn’t be able to get anything done. Could I light candles? I don’t know… I hope the world doesn’t stop.
BLINK
You know what would be sort of cool? If I could sort images in the downloads folder based on filename, or where they were downloaded. Yea, I could have one for each of my facebook friends, although her’s would be biggest. Most of the others only have one or two, and usually only because she is in there. Hey, iPhoto does facial recognition! I wonder if I could get that to simply recognise if she was in the photo and then put it in her folder? Realistically though, I don’t really keep any other photos, so I could just have a folder named ‘Taxes’ or something for her. Maybe a ‘Funny stuff’ folder as well.
BLINK
OK, four hours in, and we have 250 words. Slowing a bit, I must admit, but slowly getting there! Just keep churning!
BLINK
I know what the first thing I’d do. I’d sneak into people’s houses, see how they REALLY lived. Imagine the voyeuristic opportunities! What sort of books does Jake like? Does Miriam really have a turtle, like she claims she does? I don’t think she does. How would you even keep a turtle in Ireland, anyway? Don’t they need to sun themselves every so often? The winters wouldn’t be a huge issue, I suppose, what with the hibernating. What about Sean’s collection of old iPods? He’s never let me see it, so I don’t really think it exists. He claims that he has one of each, still unopened. I call bullshit. Then I could take a quick look into her house, and see what she is up too. Make lie in her bed for a while, with her, if the world stopped late at night, or early in the morning. What time is it?
3AM?
Shit!
An idea for Adobe
As some of you may be aware, I’m studying Multimedia as a science in DCU right now. This course requires the use of multiple pieces of Adobe software. At some point, I will be using pretty much all of them. (Right now, I’m knee deep in the obvious ones. Photoshop, Illustrator, Director, and every so often I have to jump into one of the many other pieces of software for half an hour to get exactly what I need.)
The issue with this is that the Adobe software is horridly expensive, even in student form. Sure, they might only be about 10% (or in the case of the Master Suite, 20%) of the price of the non-student editions, but still. €600 is expensive for a student.
This results in one of two things happening.
- Students are confined to the college iMacs to work on their projects, which means that they hardly ever get home, thanks to the huge amount of project work that gets dumped (most of which is group work, meaning that if you have a group any larger then 3 you will, statistically, get assraped by a group-member who refuses to do any work).
- Students pirate the Adobe software.
Now, there is a train of thought that Adobe doesn’t mind if students pirate their software. If students learn how to use the Adobe creative suite, pirate or not, they will end up using it for their creative career, and most likely buy a license once it becomes apparent to them that if they are found to be using pirated software for commercial work, they will get royally screwed.
However, there should be another option. The current student pricing on the Adobe software is insane. Nobody could expect a student to be able to afford anything other then the most basic of tools. Adobe need to sort this out, and this is how I suppose they should do it.
If a student is looking to purchase a student license, they should be allowed send proof of their degree program into Adobe, and if it is in a field which would use an extensive amount of Adobe software commercially, the student should be allowed buy the master suite for a HUGE discount. I’m talking €150, max. This license should run out a year after the student is scheduled to finish the degree, to allow them get a foot into the commercial world. After this, the now-professional should be given the option of upgrading to a normal license.
This has upsides for both Adobe and students.
- Adobe get money from students who would otherwise be pirating their software or simply using college computers. Basically, it gets Adobe into a market which it would be in otherwise. (I have NEVER seen or heard of anybody buying a student version of an Adobe product. Ever.)
- Students who would be pirating get full licenses, including the manuals, DVDs and whatever else comes in that magical Adobe box
- Adobe lock students into their ecosystem even more then they would had the students pirated (and thus had bad feelings towards Adobe) or simply used college computers.
This idea is fair to all, both students and Adobe. Sure, it works for Microsoft and their Office suite, which is sold for a HUGE discount in the most fancy version in the USA! What other companies might benefit from this?
